Celebrate Giftmas

Whollyday also known as Santa Claus Day occurring on 67 Aftermath aka 25 December.

A holyday celebrating the capitalist gift giving season.

Do the money dance, waving money in fans whilst blasting Money by Pink Floyd. Identify a ridiculously worthless toy and encourage all small children to want one. Select greyfaces to receive a particular theme gift (like banana-flavored edible underwear) from thousands.

Giftmas

Understand Maladay

Boomtime 5 Aftermath: The Apostle Malaclypse the Elder’s Holyday. A wandering Wiseman of Ancient Mediterrania (“Med-Terra” or middle earth), who followed a 5-pointed Star through the alleys of Rome, Damascus, Baghdad, Jerusalem, Mecca and Cairo, bearing a sign that seemed to read “DOOM”. (This is a misunderstanding. The sign actually read “DUMB”.)

Celebrate Mid Year’s Day

The middle day of the year. Use only middle names, stay to the middle of the road, pat or rub your or someone else’s middle (this is a great day to apply to join The Order of the Holy Chao Belly Rubbers). Point to things with your middle finger. Visit a middle school and talk about the good old days of the Middle Ages. (If you want to get technical, on Leap Year this day would run from noon of July 2 to noon of July 3, but you don’t have to get that anal unless you really want to).

Mid Year’s Day

Celebrate Imaginary Friend Day

Recognize and credit your imaginary friend, whom you blame for everything on all the other days of the year. Or help someone anonymously, but in a way they’d never expect. (“Captain Tuttle” was the made-up buddy of Benjamin Franklin “Hawkeye” Pierce and “Trapper John” McIntire on the TV show M*A*S*H. They used the mythical captain’s identity to get supplies and funds from the U. S. Military which were then sent to help an orphanage).

Imaginary Friend Day